Is not the bodies that I miss. You can always seek pleasure anywhere. That’s the easy part to get sex to fill your appetite. To satisfy your craving for lust. To feel a warm body next to you so you don’t feel lonely anymore. 
But you don’t get emotional because if you get attached then what’s the point of a hook up? 
It’s not the bodies that I miss. It’s the intimacy that I crave for. It’s being held by someone and knowing that they will never let you go. It’s that feeling of protection. Of laughing. Of talking about everything under the sun and stars. The feeling of being wanted. The feeling of being heard. They feeling of trust. That feeling of being unapologetically you without having to pretend to be anyone or anything but your authentic self. 
That feeling like you can curl up in their soul and that their love, like a blanket, will always keeps you warm. Intimacy is what I miss. 


One thought on “Intimacy 

  1. Hi!
    I don’t know where to begin.. frankly this is the first time I am typing a message, a shout-out, or a hand reaching out from the ocean of nothingness that I feel like I am drowning in.. or whatever this maybe.. I haven’t slept for days now.. and it’s 5 AM and I am not thinking straight.. clearly coz I am doing this here.. as i realised I am not on Facebook, Instagram or any of the fuck all societal acceptance tools.. the digital Life.. but sadly and quite ironically it’s (YouTube and Porn) been my escape for a while now.
    I just clicked on your Josh Talk seeing how pretty you looked and dang your boobs!
    I feel like a piece of shit, hollow, shallow, more like my horny dog (his name is Clipper) that would fuck my bean bag and less of a human, that I have always wanted to be!
    I just realised I have said enough.. but you.. I have something to say to YOU!
    You by far, are the most beautiful manifestation of life itself!
    It’s funny how you seem to have cracked the code at you tender age.. I am a fucking grandpa.. I haven’t learnt shit.
    I guess I need help.. but then I hear a voice.. I am fine.. I just need to not let my mind or heart open, stay on the bed, binge Youtube and porn.. and never forget or forgive.
    I have everything I want.. but nothing I need.
    With people who love me all around.. I find myself running.. loneliness feels almost joyful.
    Well what is joy anyway!?
    “The world would never want a sad person” – You
    “Well I don’t care a fuck” – Depression.


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